Arguing with your loved one can be quite stressful, especially if these arguments consistently come up due to underlying emotional baggage or some other deep rooted issue. And as these heated arguments continue over time, they can take a toll on us emotionally and physically.
Here are five tips to help you to stop arguing with your spouse or partner:
1. Never Use Insults
Do not use insults, for whatever reason. As insults are to arguments as wood is to fire.
Although an argument may start small, as insults are added, the argument grows and grows until it consumes the entire relationship.
Insults will only make things worse, and they keep the argument going longer than anyone wants. If you want to stop arguing in your relationship, then do not insult your partner, no matter how angry you think you are.
2. Find the Real Issue
If you find that you and your partner cannot seem to stop arguing, try to find the underlying issue for your continuous conflicts.
There must be some underlying problem that is not being addressed in any of these arguments. If the real issue was being address, you wouldn’t still be having the same argument over and over.
The issue is usually emotional in nature, since arguments begin and are prolonged as a result of emotional conflicts with those that we love.
An excellent way to find the root of a problem is to ask the right questions. Ask questions that will help your partner to communicate how they feel.
It is important that you have patience during this process and really try to see things from your partner’s perspective.
And although finding the real issue may take awhile, it’s worth it in the long-run. This is much better than having to keep putting out the intense argumentative fires in your relationship.
3. Stop Trying To Be Right
As long as you keep trying to be right all the time, you’ll never learn how to stop arguing in your relationship. Being right isn’t what’s important. The important thing is figuring out what the underlying problem is, and coming up with the right solution for it.
Pride is a major killer to what could be a loving, blissful relationship. When we allow pride and arrogance to consume us, we rarely, if ever, admit to our wrongs or try to see things from someone else’s point of view.
Don’t allow your need to be right to interfere with your better judgment and the overall happiness of you and your partner.
4. Develop Deep Gratitude
By overcoming your need to be right, and by taking responsibility for your own happiness, you’ll develop a deeper sense of gratitude for your partner. This is a great way to reduce the amount of arguments you have with your loved one, thus bringing more harmony to your relationship.
An excellent way to go about this is to develop the habit of writing out the things that you love and appreciate about your spouse or partner. Do this every morning consistently as a part of a daily routine.
Try to concentrate on all the good things about them. And try to think of the ways that they add value to your life.
By making a habit of focusing on the things about your lover that add to your fulfillment, you’ll eventually begin to see your partner in a new light.
After a few weeks of doing this, you’ll find that your behavior towards your loved one has changed for the better. This is a sure way to bring about more peace and harmony in your relationship.
5. Use Active Listening
Everyone wants to be understood. Being understood is a deep human need, and if you can truly understand this, you’ll have a lot less arguments in your relationship.
Whenever a conflict begins to start, listen intently to what your partner has to say. Don’t try to judge or add to what they’re saying; simply listen as much as you can.
This is called Active Listening, an interpersonal technique in which you listen while communicating that you truly understand how your loved one is feeling.
The more you actively listen, the more you will understand exactly what may be causing the arguments in the first place. You’ll begin to develop more empathy for what your partner is feeling, which then allows you to better find win-win solutions to the issues at hand.
3 Love Tips For Having a Stress Free Relationship
Whether you’re in a serious relationship or you’ve been married for years, deep down inside everyone has the ideal of having the most stress free relationship possible. While it may be impossible to have a romantic relationship that is completely free from any kind of stress, it is quite possible to minimize the amount of stress in your romantic relationship.
The most important thing to remember when learning how to have a stress free relationship is to give you and your significant other enough the time necessary to make the small that lead to a more blissful relationship. Change won’t happen overnight, but with a few pointers, anyone can learn how to have a more stress free relationship with the one they love.
Begin today, and start implementing these love tips for more peace of mind and blissful romance. Don’t hesitate; it all comes down to taking action and being committed to making things work between you and your partner.
So, here are some of the best love tips for learning how to have a stress free relationship:
1. Learn To Forgive Quickly
Most of you might be thinking that this really means to forgive your romantic partner as quickly as possible, when actually this love tip has to do with both forgiving yourself and your lover of their faults and weaknesses.
It’s quite obvious that the way we treat ourselves will stem into every relationship that we have, especially with those that we love romantically. If we are unforgiving and extremely tough on ourselves, we will then have the same attitude with our loved one.
So forgive yourself today, right now, of all of your faults and mistakes whether or not they relate to your romantic relationship. This lifted burden alone will free up the mental energy and enthusiasm to forgive your partner much more quickly and readily so that you both can enjoy a more stress free relationship.
2. Take More Liberties
Every heard someone say the phrase, “I’ve taken the liberty of…”? You probably have. What this person has done is quite simple; they took some sort of initiative to accomplish something. If you can develop the habit of taking more initiative when it comes to meeting the needs of your romantic partner, you will begin to have a more blissful and stress free relationship.
Go beyond simply asking your partner what he or she needs and begin to become more in-tune with the daily requirements for their well-being. The more in-tune you are with what will increase the quality of life for your lover, the more receptive and caring they will become towards you.
This love tip will ensure that you and your partner have fewer fights and less insecurity with one another because of the emotional investments you will be making towards each other’s well-being. So begin today to think of ways you can “take the liberty” of meeting your lover’s deepest needs, even before they realize they had a particular need.
3. Celebrate Your Lover’s Successes
If you want to learn how to have a more stress free and blissful relationship then you must learn how to celebrate your romantic partner’s achievements and successes, no matter how big or small they may be. When you habitually show enthusiasm for your lover’s good fortune, it tightens the bond between the two of you and creates a sense of security and well-being for one another.
Sometimes relationships suffer simply because people are starving for attention and recognition, which is one of our deepest needs. We all want to be appreciated, and this especially applies to those of us in romantic relationships. If there is anyone that we want to appreciate our efforts and good fortunes, it’s the one we love the most.
Learn to celebrate your lover’s life on the whole. Aren’t you happy to be with them? Aren’t you happy to share an existence with such a person? If so, then begin to show that love enthusiastically by celebrating the big and small things that they accomplish.
As your lover feels this vast amount of support from you, they will grow to become more invested into your well-being as well.